I ran across the phrase “zero-based gratitude” the other day. You likely have heard of “zero-based budgeting” which is when a budget is created from zero / nothing. Zero-based budgeting is a contrast to traditional budgeting when one starts with a previous budget, and then either increases or decreases it from there. This method invites comparisons – more or less than the previous year, month, day. It also encourages a bit of complacency and deceptive expectations. We simply may assume and expect something because it was in the budget last year, or we did it last time, or that’s the way it was before.
Applying that attitude toward gratitude, we can easily find ourselves in the trap of taking things for granted, or being disappointed when things do not meet our “comparison” expectations. In other words, we are incremental when it comes to gratitude. We’re thankful if we acquire a new client, or increase revenues, or reduce expenses, or lose weight. We’re ungrateful when we lose a client, gain weight, have an unexpected expense, someone treats us worse than before, or don’t get as much sleep as we planned.
The pleasant alternative is to start each day from a baseline of zero – no expectations. Everything is new, fresh, exciting. I wake up and am grateful for breath, a warm bed, lights, running water, the ability to walk and talk. Wow! I am grateful to have a customer to serve, a computer to type on, a car to drive, an office, co-workers, and so forth. Starting from scratch, we would see the little things and basics often overlooked, as well as the bigger things, because ALL would be new. Each moment would be unfettered.
So start each day “zero-based” … and be grateful for all that you receive in the present, without regard to whether it is more or less than you had in the past, or what you might have in the future.
I rewatched a movie recently based on a book I really enjoyed titled, “The Way of the Peaceful Warrior.” The core piece of wisdom in the book /movie is, “There’s never nothing going on. There are no ordinary moments.” The message is clear – every moment is sacred and unique, not ordinary.
I think about how much of my day I consider “ordinary” because I am distracted by noise, clutter, demands, expectations, things to do, people to see, plans to make, goals to achieve. What triggered this was holding my one-week old grandson Henry, and listening to him purr as he breathed and slept. This was no ordinary moment. I was completely focused on his breathing and the movements of his little body. I was present and aware of what was happening.
So PAUSE right now and take notice of what’s going on — the extra-ordinariness of your life. The paradox is that we must empty our minds to “nothing” in order to become aware that there’s never “nothing” going on. It is through this unfettering that we become awake, aware, and alive.
As we approach the end of this calendar year, and look ahead to next year, I encourage my clients, friends, and spouse to complete a “PERFECT YEAR” process. Below are the recommended steps …
What Would Make Your Year Perfect? As you look ahead to next year, what do you want to keep, add, change, redo, evolve, be, have, become, do, offer, fix, solve, provide, improve, initiate, learn. On a sheet of paper, identify 25 elements which would make your year absolutely perfect. Include those elements that are already working perfectly and also include those that are additionally needed to have this be an absolutely ideal year for you.
Consider ALL areas of your life. Force yourself to identify 25 items. Write them down. If you are doing this with a spouse / partner, each person should complete their PERFECT YEAR separately.
Schedule a conversation when you share your Perfect Years. Sharing should occur without judgment – listen, seek to understand. Why is that item important to that person? Why did you choose the things things on your list?
Next, there is usually a consolidation that takes place because it is likely that not everything on both Perfect Years can be achieved! So PRIORITIZE based on the following critical resources … TIME and MONEY. Literally, get out a calendar for the next year and schedule things that are important. Similarly, work on a budget that is aligned with what you want.
Follow-through! I recommend that at least quarterly you review your Perfect Years and discuss progress, changes, celebrate accomplishments, etc.
By following this process, your YEAR/LIFE will be “unfettered” and more fulfilling, and you will achieve MORE of what you want for yourself and those closest to you.
A recent post by Seth Godin really struck a chord with me. Whatever you are doing, identify what the scarce resource is … and by the way, it is usually not money. For example, if you are climbing Mount Everest, the scarce resource is warmth and weight. That’s what you care about—not how much the sleeping bag costs. In many businesses, the scare resource is a trusting relationship, not the product itself. For others it might be time. Still others, the “experience” of the transaction or sale.
Consider your business … what do you offer that your competitors do not? If 500 similar businesses can provide what you do, don’t expect to get paid a premium. Your value increases in proportion to providing what others cannot.
I love the wisdom of Yoda. One of his golden nuggets is his advice to Luke Skywalker … “Do or do not; there is no try.”
Those with passion do; those without passion try. When I say, “I’ll try,” I build in an excuse. If I start but don’t finish, I can always say, “Well, I tried.” But if I say, “I’ll do,” I commit to finish no matter what. By definition, the word “try” implies potential failure.
Are you “trying” to improve your current state? Are you “trying” to enhance your finances, marketing, selling, leadership, relationships, customer service, employee development? Stop trying so hard! Make a true commitment to change. Pick something and do it or don’t do it – there is no try.
Do you realize what makes music? It’s the space between the notes. It’s the quiet time. A practice I implemented at the beginning of the year — and am recommitting to again — is Daily Quiet Time. I find just hitting the “pause” button during my day … for just 10-15 minutes … enables me to enhance my focus, gain greater clarity, and refresh my energy. My music is sweeter because of the spaces, which restores my intention and direction. “Why am I doing what I am doing?”
“Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence.”
– Max Ehrmann, “Desiderata”
We are confronted with insurmountable opportunities.~Walt Kelly
What a wonderful reminder and perspective. I generally associate the word “insurmountable” with words like “odds,” “obstacles,” “problems,” “difficulties.” The reality is there are magnificent possibilities if we change our point-of-view. I also love the concept of being “confronted” with these opportunities. We are confronted to the extent we are attentive and awake.
What “insurmountable opportunity” are you confronted with right now? Opportunities to connect, laugh, love, engage, ignite, inspire, serve, make a positive difference, give value, make meaning, unfetter.
